Being Invisible In the Ranks of the Disabled

I’ve been categorized as disabled since I hit 18. This was thanks to the proactive move of my parents who knew that with my severe bipolar disorder, living life like other adults wouldn’t be easy. Because of this designation, I was able to quickly gain access to the various supports offered by the disability service centers of the colleges I attended, qualify for certain subsidized housing programs, and also, in combination with scholarships, pay for most of my undergraduate schooling. Living with a disability for so long I have discovered that there are many options regarding assistance for almost every area of life, including employment. However, those employment assistance programs are not designed for people like me.

I don’t really like to differentiate people with disabilities by saying high functioning or low functioning because it feels dismissive of our contributions. No matter what our cognitive abilities allow us to do or not do we are all functioning in a way that is valuable, needed, and unique to society. However, I know this is how many people who work in disability service industries view and categorize us. The bulk of resources and attention go to individuals deemed as “low functioning” with developmental disabilities. These positions are often in the service or retail industries and typically consist of food prep, stocking shelves, bagging groceries, wrangling carts, and other such tasks. Having worked with developmentally disabled people myself they find purpose and pride in the work they do when given the chance and the support that they need, and I wish there was a way for people in my situation to find the same.

People looking from the outside might be thinking to themselves “Well work is work. A job is a job. Just be grateful for what you can get.” What they fail to realize is that working below our skill level is demeaning, demoralizing, and negatively impacts our mental and physical health. Much like those without disabilities who refuse to work jobs they deem “beneath them,” we want the opportunity for career growth and to use the skillsets we’ve worked hard to cultivate. Much like non-disabled individuals didn’t go to college for 4+ years to fold clothes, neither did I.

I like to work, often taking on volunteer roles while I’m in between jobs so that I feel like I’m contributing in some way. I’ve worked a variety of jobs in several industries since I was legally old enough to do so. I started out in retail as most of us do but really struggled a lot due to my social anxiety and difficulty being on my feet for long hours. After building a relationship with the local Mental Health Association I transitioned into administrative work, covering for their fulltime administrative assistant during holidays or their vacation time. This was also not easy because of my phone anxiety. These were jobs I worked throughout college while I was on break. To me, they were “okay” until I got my degree.

After graduating I actually found work related to my field of study, but soon found out that direct care and social services were not a sustainable career choice for me. I’m too empathetic, too closely related to the problems I saw, and constantly took work home with me. These jobs were the most demanding, lowest paying, and least likely to have supports in place for employees. My mental health couldn’t take it.

Around this time I started working with the Division of Vocational Rehabilitation (DVR) to see if the resources they provided could help me find a position that fit not just my qualifications, but my need for certain accommodations. They gave me skills assessments, interviewed me, and asked what I would like to do. They seemed genuinely stumped at how to help me. As far as office jobs, the companies they contracted with had mainly data entry positions. I was enrolled with them for years, yet every job that I was hired for in a position I actually wanted I got on my own. I even asked an old family friend to be my career mentor and he was much more helpful. He went over and helped me rewrite my resume, conducted mock interviews with me, and put me in touch with other people who knew that could possibly help me. DVR couldn’t help me with these things because their career counselors don’t have the experience of what market research or digital media companies look for in a candidate.

The one service that may have been beneficial to use, but I chose not to out of fear of retaliation is having a career counselor talk to your current employer about providing accommodations you need. It sounds great in theory, but imagine having to have another adult accompany you to your boss and HR in a corporate office who is not an attorney. Professional retaliation is bad enough when you seek accommodations on your own, it’s bound to be even worse when you look like a “case” because you need a social worker to speak on your behalf. Yes, I know we’re technically protected under the ADA (American’s with Disabilities Act) but it does not stop people from being fired or retaliated against after disclosing a mental illness because employers can use ambiguous tactics to get you removed or push you to remove yourself.

There needs to be a change in supported employment and employment programs for those with disabilities to include resources that benefit people like myself who want to and can work in demanding, highly skilled, corporate positions with minor accommodations. When they contract with employers to hire people with disabilities they should be looking at more than retail and food services type of jobs. An employer knowing beforehand that employees sourced through a supported work program may need the ability to work from home and/ or have flexible hours for their mental health removes the awkward and embarrassing interactions where they need to ask for them later on. Employers knowing that an employee can be easily distracted because of office noise and is most productive when wearing headphones reduces the chance of scenarios where they are penalized for wearing them. Employers understanding that an employee may need to step out of the office for 15 minutes once or twice a day,  outside of lunch, to ground themselves because of debilitating anxiety takes the punishment for “too many/ too long breaks” off the table. There are various other accommodations that people with a mental illness can use that do not affect productivity or cost money, yet that is the excuse given when denying them. Managers would rather an employee stare at a computer screen while getting no work done because they are trying to hold on to their emotions instead of allowing them to take a short break outside of the office so they can reset because there is an illusion of work being done.

Disability advocates are constantly reminding people that the majority of disabled people want to work, and would prefer to not have to be on disability. The reason the disabled community has such a high unemployment rate is not that we don’t want to work, but because of the barriers to safe, healthy work environments. While great strides have been made creating accommodating workplaces for those with physical or developmental disabilities, people with disabilities stemming from mental illnesses are left behind.