The Cuckoos Nest
Thoughts on my own struggles with mental and illness and discussion of mental health in general
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Why I Don’t Want Kids: Another Blog In A Sea of Many
As a 30 year old woman the topic of whether or not I want kids, when I plan on having kids, and why I don’t want kids has been quite popular in the conversational rounds. Actually, me being 30 years old has nothing to do with the topic, because it’s been asked over and over again since I was a teen. My duty to have kids was placed into my life goals from an early age, without my consent or realization. I, like many other young girls, was expected to play house and coddle baby dolls in an effort to make the progression into motherhood a no brainer. Much like…
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Who Really Deserves Forgiveness
There has always been a lot of talk about how forgiving others for doing you wrong is one of the best things you can do for yourself. I, however, feel very differently. You are in no way obligated to forgive someone who has hurt you, especially if the act of forgiving is more draining that the initial hurt. In fact, this so called “forgiveness” you may claim is more than likely a lie. A lie you tell others, and a lie you tell yourself. Like when someone asks how you are doing and you say “fine”, but really you feel like your life is in shambles. This “forgiveness” is just…
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The Blackness Spectrum
Disclaimer: This post is meant to be tongue in cheek, kind of. Over the years I have come to find that Blackness exists on a spectrum. The spectrum ranges from Conscious Black to New Black. Now to explain what exactly these two extremes are. First we have the Conscious Blacks. These individuals can be found in abundance on twitter and tumblr and usually have some variation of god, king, queen, or melanated in their handles. They post about this false belief that all of our ancestors were kings and queens in Africa (quite often spelled Afrika) and how we, through our dark skin, are somehow gods on earth. There is…
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When You Can’t Trust Yourself: The Struggle to Know Love
One important fact to know about me is that I have Bipolar Disorder. This diagnosis is debatable depending on which one of the many doctors I’ve seen since I was 12 you may ask, but this is what makes the most sense. This fact about me is important because it shapes how I view my world, my relationships, and myself. It also greatly impacts how others view me and interpret my actions. Now, I’ve titled this post “When You Can’t Trust Yourself: The Struggle to Know Love”, because with having a mental illness, and being able to recognize it, there is a tendency to question everything you feel, especially in…
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Loving your Blackness: Revolutionary, Life Affirming, and….A Catch 22?
Today I stumbled upon an article in The Guardian it brought to light something that is often overlooked in the discussions on both mental health, racism, misogynoir, and self-love. The article spoke about the devastating mental health effects of being a Black woman in a white supremacist society. Not just how we feel when racism is overt or our responses to microaggressions. But the very real internal battle we experience with being and showing love for our authentic selfs and having to often push that down and hide it in order to make white people comfortable. I’m sure some of my more “woke” counterparts will scoff at this and lament that…